I recently finished Fall to Grace: A Revolution of God, Self, and Society by Jay Bakker. I have to admit that it was exactly what I needed to read at this time of transition in my life. It was a reminder to me that it was by grace that I was forgiven and it is through that same grace that I must learn to forgive. At a time when I am so focused on me (a little self-centeredness feels justified in the circumstances), it reminded me that instead I should be even more aware of God's "revolutionary" grace. A time when everything else in uncertain, the one thing I can hold onto is God and the relationship he created with me.

The book itself gave me many things to think about. It gave me new ways to view things that I had never really considered. On page 113, he writes, "Sin is still bad, mind you. But it is bad for us. Abba isn't mad at us for our sin. If anything, He probably feels sorry for us because He knows it prevents us from fulfilling our potential. Sin carries its own punishments: It prevents us from completing the radical transformation that God intends. It prevents us from realizing God's grace." It is a profound statement that I am still weighing in my mind. Not necessarily because I disagree with it, but because I have such a strong desire to not disappoint God. This idea challenges my automatic thoughts; ideas I have had for as long as I can remember.

There were a few thing I didn't like about the books. First, there were a few times when he mentioned specific people he disagreed with and it felt like he was taking shots at them. Perhaps, this is unfair and that wasn't his intention. And if I'm being honest, it's just one of my pet peeves. I feel like if your argument is strong, then pointing out other people is unneccessary.

The other thing I struggled a little with was the last chapters. In the last couple chapters, Jay challenges the church to offer love and grace to others, including homosexuals, bisexuals,and anyone else we mistreat or show lack of understanding to. While I don't disagree with what Jay is saying, the chapters felt out of place. The topic felt like it wasn't given enough. It felt like it was two books pieced together when each book could have stood on its own.

All those things aside, I was challenged, encouraged, and feel like I am beginning to understand what God's grace really looks like.

***viralbloggers provided me with a copy of this book to read and review. I have complete freedom on what I post.

Reflection 1: The first of many! So, my mind is still reeling, my body is still exhausted, and I am completely overwhelmed by GOD. I went with some expectation. I knew there would be exciting worship and speakers, but I couldn't have expected to be lifted to the heights and then within hours to be utterly crushed and then lifted to the heights and then crushed...over and over and over again. So, where to start...from the beginning. You walk into Phillips Arena and it is filled to capacity with loud, screaming young adults. Chris Tomlin begins worship and Lecrae jumps in. Louie Giglio then delivers his amazing hyped up message and we are released to community groups (which I have every intention of skipping for the rest of the week, because afterall, there is a very big part of me that came for vacation). Ok this is where the good stuff starts so stay with me... Tim Smith, a pastor from Mississippi, begins our study. We start by reading Isaiah 14:13, 14 You said in your heart, "I will raise my throne above the stars of God; I will sit enthroned on the mount of assembly, on the utmost heights of the sacred mountain. I will ascend about the tops of the clouds; I will make myself like the Most High." Satan is constantly trying to ascend, to make himself powerful! Phillippians 2:6-8 Who being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death - even death on a cross! Jesus was willing to descend. He came in humility. Then Tim closed by saying you are never more like the enemy than when you try to ascend up, when pride exalts you and you are never more like Jesus than when we humble ourselves. This one is going to take a long time for me to digest. Lord, help me to descend, descend, descend.